楼大哥 (Big Brother Lowe)。《春草》，第19集
You have a college degree. You are capable of changing your fate. You got this. Even as the words pile onto Lowe’s consciousness, his weary and broken clothes still reflect his gloom outlook on city life. He wonders if he could really make it big in the city. After all, he has heard rumors from his fellow townsman who warned of the exploitation and income disparities that plagued countless migrant workers into money-stricken conditions; some even returned back to their old village to avoid government fines. But perhaps he is different. With a college degree governing where he must work, the question of job security should not be an issue. Yet, his inner voice continues to creep in like an undying spirit with regrets passed down from those who tried their luck in the city before him. What if I am stuck working in the factory? My hukou is now a city one. My country decides where I work. Therefore, it is only right for me to work in the city. As the train approaches Shaanxi, Lowe notices a plum blossom tree with its buds still closed. Even in the coldness of the winter, the plum blossom continues to grow. The sight of such an unwavering plant encapsulated Lowe and made him wonder whether his life up to now has shared the same fate as a plum blossom. A few minutes later, the train stopped. Exiting the train station, Lowe lets out a firm exhale and looks ahead into the crowded streets. I can do this.
Rumbling sounds of outside trucks and heavy machineries echoed through the aisles of the factory that Lowe has come to familiarize as his new life. Each day he manages the production of concrete for local state-owned construction companies. He has grown accustomed to yelling at his workers to hurry up and carry the mined materials to the machineries, pacing back and forth around the site to ensure nothing goes south , and reminding himself and others that his production site has to meet a certain quota set by the end of the month according to the State guidelines. Lowe felt as though his college degree should offer him a more fulfilling life than instructing workers to mine materials for cement–perhaps a position in the Ministry of Finance. Sadly, the reality never seems to fit with the idealized expectations. There always seems to be a missing piece in Lowe’s day, whether that be the self-care promise he made with his family when he left Beigou Village or the happiness he hoped the city would bring for him. As a matter of fact, day in and day out, Lowe lives life like the dusty sacks of raw materials that have yet to be dumped and grounded together: incomplete.
A few months went by with Lowe working from the sounds of the morning’s car beeps to the echoes of the night’s drunken streetwalkers. He lives in a rather compact hostel with only a squeaking bed as his furniture. This living arrangement made sense to Lowe because the drawers and tables would have taken up too much space for them to have much use anyway. However, that does not mean living in the space is comfortable. With the corners of his room in hand-reaching distance, Lowe often wakes up hitting his hands against the wall or finds himself on the edge about to fall off his bed. Unfortunately, Lowe is limited to this hostel because the State relocated countless workers to live in the area, so to house everyone the State had to create more living spaces from pre-existing ones. As a mere director of a production site, Lowe had no say in this arrangement. However, since Chinese New Year is around the corner, Lowe looks forward to returning home and celebrating this joyous holiday with his family.
While at the train station waiting to buy his ticket home, he hears a loud microphone sound: “Due to a technical error along the railroad track, all rides have been delayed until further notice!” Cursing of the train system quickly followed the announcement. Lowe stumbles back a little before catching himself and snapping back into conscience. How could the train station fail on New Year’s Eve? This has to be a mistake!” Even with the announcement, a swarm of travelers still pushed through the crowded lines of the train station to buy their ticket and secure a spot closer to the train track; all prepared to fight for their seat once the train arrives. Worries about missing the train and spending his time alone in this cruel city engulfed Lowe’s mind and drew despair upon him. Just then, a man bumps into Lowe and causes Lowe to drop his baggage. What just happened? The man apologies, reaches down to pick up Lowe’s baggage and hands it over to him. Confused, Lowe asks why the man bothered to help him. Amidst the loud crowd, the man introduces himself as “Oscar”, an executive of Shaanxi Shangnan Transportation Bureau, and explains that he feels terribly sorry that such a disaster happened on New Year’s Eve and that he and his colleagues are working to solve the issue. Before he finishes explaining and leaves, Lowe makes a sudden realization about the man’s background from his familiar accent. “Hey, where are you from if you don’t mind me asking?”
“I’m from down south, Beigou Village.”
“Oh, I’m from there too! What a coincidence.”
“No way. It has been such a long time since I met someone from my home village. Come come, let’s head to someone quieter to talk some more.”
Lowe follows Oscar to a room within the train station. There, they caught up with their stories and laughed like old friends. Apparently, Oscar was hired by the State during the advent of China’s rapid industrialization to rally the rural-hukou construction workers and keep their spirit high as new railroad tracks were built. He too has a college degree.
“Wow, we were both assigned by the State to manage construction-related projects. Deng Xiaoping must really want a more modern China.”
Oscar remembers hearing on the news about China’s plan to reform the nation and modernize China’s infrastructures and systems.
“It is unfortunate that businesses cannot form under this economic plan.”
“Why’s that?”
“Regulations around private businesses are incredibly difficult to overcome. It would also be difficult to justify starting a business when much of what we do involves the State enterprises.”
Lowe understands Oscar’s point. He himself also thought about abandoning his post to start his own cement business. However, the reality behind private businesses remains restrained by the State and casted down as an unfavorable move in the Reform period because the State cannot afford the risks private businesses pose for governmental control over economic activities. Even though regulations were set up to counter the rise in private enterprises, the exploitation of China’s economic constitution/laws, such as forming collectives, allowed these low-numbered businesses to avoid high taxes and regulations from the State [1]. To Lowe, the risks greatly outweigh the potential benefits.
“But you are still doing pretty well, right? After all, you have a college degree.”
Oscar smiles and pats Lowe on the back.
“As long as my family is happy, I have no complaints.”
The two may not have known each other for long, but Lowe felt a sense of relief after that last comment because their mutual understanding that family takes precedence over personal struggles softens Lowe’s previous doubts about the city’s influence on his life. Lowe recognizes now that his mother’s wish for his well-being after his departure from the village encompasses more than himself: he bears the hopes and dreams of his townspeople for they cannot explore the city as freely as him nor earn as much money as him. The money Lowe sends back home thus brings value to his own work that goes beyond the repetitive and boring nature of his work. He may feel alone at times and unworthy from not holding governmental positions, but all his work is for the betterment of his family and the inspiration that guides more of his people to pursue college. Therefore, it is worth it.
Oscar and Lowe finish their conversation after seeing the train heading back home approach the station. As Lowe boards the train, he wonders if perhaps–like cement–he is meant to pave a path for younger generations to follow for life in the city. With that final thought, the rhythmic sounds of train joints fill the afternoon travel.
—
When Lowe heard Spring Grass’s story, he remembered his own struggles navigating his place in the city world. Everything was decided for him by the State with no meaningful regards for his interests. However, he still managed to create a sense of home in the city–mostly because his college degree secured his occupation. He even remembered his conversation with Oscar: family means everything. Business does not and cannot.
The sight of Spring Grass carrying her daughter out on the streets with a basket of peanuts in hand to sell and scrape by for the day profoundly touched Lowe. What bravery and love motivated this selfless mother to live such a cruel life in the city when life in the village probably surpasses that of an impoverished migrant worker. The logic did not add up but when Lowe heard about her desperate search for her husband, Lowe understood that Spring Grass too wanted security and reunion for her family. A mother doing what is best for her family to survive in the city.
After working for a few years in the factory, Lowe had a reasonable savings in his bank account; perhaps he could loan Spring Grass some money to help ensure security for her family–at least for the time-being. After all, Spring Grass is from the same district as him, so they are zijiren and should not stand on grounds of strangers. It is decided then. Hearing about Lowe’s offering to help purchase a stall for Spring Grass to sell her peanuts, Spring Grass politely refused, saying that she cannot accept such a generous offering. Lowe pressed forward with his offering, stating that the offering is his faith in Spring Grass’s capability to do right as a businesswoman and as a mother. Spring Grass looked down at her sleeping child and decided that she would pay Lowe back as soon as her family finds footing in the city. You have my respect, Spring Grass. He smiled and thought to himself. Perhaps the Old Man in the Sky destined me to meet Spring Grass and help her. It is only right that I do.
On his trip back to Shaanxi, he saw plum blossom trees again like he did a few years ago. However, this time around, the flowers opened wide. Even through the hardships of the winter, the plum blossom found its strength and blossomed beautiful flowers to mark its success through another demoralizing winter. What a sight it was for Lowe. And with the wind blowing hard against the plum blossom, Lowe caught sight of an elusive young woman standing below the plum blossom. She faded in and out of sight, but Lowe finally recognized who she was. The charismatic smile, the honesty vibe around her, and the child in her arms: it was Spring Grass.
Work Cited:
[1] Young, Susan. 1989. Policy, Practice and the Private Sector in China. The Australian Journal of Chinese Affairs, Jan. 1989, No. 21, pp. 57-80.