And So I Walked

When I first sat down to read And So I Walked: Reflections on Chance, Choice, and the Camino de Santiago, I wasn’t sure what to expect. I’d never heard of the Camino de Santiago before, and didn’t consider myself to be a memoir type of girl. “Just try the first chapter,” I told myself.

I’d planned on reading for only a few minutes—I was meeting friends later and didn’t want to be late. But as the minutes ticked by, I kept flipping through the pages, devouring each word. Soon enough, I was a hundred pages in (and late).

Earlier that month, I’d joined Telos’ Winter Study book club, which is how I found myself reading And So I Walked, the Reverend Anne Gardner’s account of her journey along the Camino—a 500-mile stretch across Spain marking St. James’ historic pilgrimage, now annually traversed by thousands of wayfarers from all over the world.

Gardner, a high school chaplain, was not alone on her journey. She was accompanied by her wife, Beth; a former colleague, Jess; and two graduating students, Sascha and Meredith. Each member of the group entered the Camino with the hope that the walk would illuminate or enlighten that elusive “something” in their life. They appointed themselves with nicknames such as “Just Go,” “Go Slow,” “Ami-go,” “Go-Go,” and “Let Go.” These names represent the purpose of their respective journeys. For Rev. Gardner, taking on the name “Let Go” encapsulates her desire to let go of her need for control and allow God to unravel her plans in favor of His. She and all her companions are searching for the magic of the Camino.

One component of the Camino’s magic is realizing the wonder of others’ love for her. When first hearing about it, she was worried the walk would be a solo trip, but soon found a cohort of loved ones walking not only with her, but for her. Beth, knowing how important the Camino was to her wife, braved the strenuous path out of love and devotion to Gardner. Sascha walked the Camino not from his own interest in St. James’ pilgrimage, but so that Garnder wouldn’t be alone. The unpredictability and stress of the Camino allowed Gardner to realize and appreciate this radical love, and it reminds us to give thanks for our own loved ones. Despite times of unraveling, or rather especially in times of unraveling, love is a constant.

On the Camino, taking a step away from the comforts and chaos of the modern world allowed Gardner and her companions to evaluate themselves and their lives, learn about their strengths and weaknesses, and determine how and where to go forth after ending their journey. I finished And So I Walked the day after I started it. Every page, I marveled at a new joy, ached over Gardner’s sorrows, and simply sat in silence with the story. Gardner’s account reminded me to joyfully embrace the unexpected wonders of life with an open mind and open heart instead of dwelling on what I perceive is the “right” path.

Gardner’s memoir even convinced me to walk the Camino myself. Just kidding. I might have been convinced if it weren’t for the fleas, but alas…

 

Anna Halfman ’27 is a prospective Economics and Art History major who loves dancing, reading, hiking, and sharing baked goods, especially chocolate-y ones. On campus, she enjoys dancing with StuCo and CoDa, and working on Alhambra Consulting and Williams Investment Group.