Category Archives: Legendary

Race Report: Great Brewers Gran Prix of Gloucester

Last Friday, at 7:30pm, I hopped in my van and drove three and a half hours in the rain on the Mass Pike to Cambridge, where I spent five or so fitful hours asleep, before waking up at the ungodly hour of 5:45am to drive the final hour to Gloucester, excuse me, Glaaahstah, Mass, for the first day of the Great Brewers Gran Prix of Gloucester, one of the biggest cyclocross races in North America.

When I arrived at Stage Fort Park, a very pretty municipal park right on the Atlantic coast, the temperature was maybe 50 degrees, and it was misting enthusiastically.  I picked up my number, got it pinned, and headed out on my pre-ride.  After my tire pressure fiasco at the BCA cyclocross, I wanted to make sure I was smart about how much air I put in my tires.  Traction was scarce on the grassy, off-camber turns that made up much of the course, so I went as low as I could without worrying about pinch flats.

The Cat 4 men’s field was huge: 125 were registered, and all told, I think 99 raced on Saturday morning.  Due to some last minute points calculations at crossresults.com, I was staged on the 8th row instead of the 15th.  Not that it made much of a difference; with a field that large the start was bound to be messy, and I quickly found myself trapped behind a massive wall of riders as we sprinted our way up the finishing straight, turned onto the dirt, made our way up the stairs through the beer garden, and then transitioned into the off-camber spirals.  Yep, off-camber spirals.  All hope of staying on the bike was abandoned, everyone hopped off and tromped up, down, and around the turns before hopping back on for the straight shot to the barriers.  After the barriers, it was back around towards the north side of the course, which brought more technical turns, a short descent, then a straight shot on dirt to the bottom of the famed run-up (from hell).  See below:

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I’m the speck at the bottom of the hill (far left).  Thankfully, I had put my toe spikes on my shoes, which helped me claw my way up the run-up a bit faster than most.  The top of the hill brought a few more turns before a very difficult chute which quickly became very muddy, and then a long, fairly open section past the pits which led to still more turns before a quick jaunt through the sand pits (aka beach volleyball courts).  Then it was back onto the finishing straight (which was really an uphill curve), which was almost short enough to sprint but not quite, and really put the burn in the legs.  Overall, it was a difficult but still relatively fast course.

I rode a fairly mediocre race.  As I said, I got held up in race traffic in the first lap, and then spent the rest of the race trying to pick people off.  I had some great technical moments, and I was able to make up time in the off the bike sections, but I also royally messed up a few sections.  I never quite got the hang of riding the off-camber spirals, and towards the end of the race I took a turn too tightly and end up tangled in course tape, destroying my chances for finishing in the top 40.  I ended the day 43rd, which was higher than my predicted finish, so I count that as a win.  Below is another photo from Saturday, showcasing my inability to ride the off-camber spirals (also I think I might be wining the unofficial team quad-off).

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I stuck around to enjoy the beer garden and watch the pro races, which were spectacular.  The mist stopped and the course drained a bit before the pros went at it, so they were super super fast.  It was fun to see current National Champ Jeremy Powers take the win, though I was cheering mostly for his rivals Ryan Trebon and Tim Johnson on the Cannondale p/b Cyclocrossworld.com team.

Sunday began similarly to Saturday: up at 5:45am, out of Cambridge by 6.  There was more substantial rain coming down as I got my new number, and got in one pre-ride lap.  The course was changed for Sunday’s race: the beach volleyball court was gone, replaced by a jaunt through the sand on the beach which ended with a set of stairs.  The dreaded off-camber spirals remained, as did the run-up from hell.  The previous day’s racing, combined with the precipitation, had turned the course into a muddy, rutty mess.  I was staged in about the same location, in a field of 97.  I tried for a good start, but once again got stuck in traffic.

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My race is slightly less memorable: I didn’t make as many technical mistakes, but suffered from my lack of sleep and from the previous day’s efforts.  The beach run was tough, and none of the 4’s could ride it, as far as I could see.  The stair run-up was fun, and I always gained time as I pushed up it.  I got a lot dirtier than I had been on Saturday.  By the end of the day everything I had brought with me was either wet, dirty, or both.  I ended up 48th.

Overall, I got two finishes in the top 50% of my category, and I got to enjoy the atmosphere and course of one of the best professional cross races in North America.  It was a totally great weekend.  I take a “mid-season break” this weekend, before returning to racing in Troy, NY on the weekend of the 13th-14th at the Uncle Sam GP.

2011 Road Season Recap, or “Yes, I’m really doing it!”

I’ve been meaning to write this post for more than a month, and I would be lying if I said this was the first free moment I’ve had since our last race.  But, as you all know, the end of the school year is inevitably a crazy time, and the beginning of summer a sleepy time, and as such this is the first time that I have sat down and really put forward the effort necessary to collect my thoughts and put them all down in one place.  So here it is: the (un)Official Williams Cycling Club Road (pronounced ‘Row-add’) Season Recap.

First, the numbers:

  • ECCC Races attended: 3 (up from 2 last year)
  • Ephs racing: 8 (10 if we include non-ECCC races and former Ephs, which allows us to count Morgan and Cruz, and they certainly should count).
  • Ephs racing for the first time…ever: 4
  • 1st Place Finishes: 7
  • Top 10’s: More than 25 Top 10 finishes (my best count was around 28)
  • Crashes/mechanicals: a lot

Rankings (nobody cares about these):

  • ECCC Overall Ranking: 3oth out of 53 schools (16th in Div II)
  • Women’s C: Amy was 4th overall and 1st in Div II
  • Men’s C: Erik tied for 3rd overall and tied for 1st in Div II
  • Men’s D: I (John) was 9th overall and 4th in Div II

The above rankings are the offical ECCC rankings for the entire season.  If you look at the rankings after the Dartmouth/UNH weekend, effectively the end of our season, we’re 26th overall (15th in Div II), and both Amy and I are ranked higher in our respective categories.

Now that I’m done tooting my own horn, let me highlight some important things about these results.  Everyone who attended more than one race (that’s Amy, Erik, Henry, Ian, Todd, and me for those of you keeping score at home) contributed points to our overall ranking.  And we only attended three race weekends.  Even though we weren’t at every race, we consistently performed well across the board at the races we attended.  We ranked higher than schools like NYU, Boston College (the alma mater of the aero-potato if I’m not mistaken), and Rutgers, all schools with more people on their teams in all categories.  Not half bad for a school of 2000 nerds with only 8 people on its cycling team.

But all those numbers and rankings, that’s all boring stuff.  What we really should care about is all the other stuff, the stuff that can’t be quantified or ranked, the stuff that makes cycling a club sport, not some lame, overly serious varsity “athletic program”, right?

Superlatives:

  • Most likely to wear ridiculous glasses: Henry
  • Most likely to sport an epic ‘Race Face’ (also known as ‘Thug Mug’): Ian, at Yale (evidence)
  • Most likely to wave at onlookers during a race whilst dominating the competition: Amy
  • Most likely to sport unfortunate facial hair and pant heavily (that sounds worse than I meant it to): Erik
  • Most likely to take sweet photos and/or vomit during a race (but not at the same time): Todd
  • Most likely to not find “Men’s D, why not Men’s A++?” funny: John
  • Most likely to win a midnight crit after a raucous cookout and party (purely hypothetically, of course): Morgan
  • Most likely to fight the law, and have the law win: JJ

I would say, given the above outlined information, that we had a successful season.  Thanks to all y’all for super fun races, all the fun times in the ark, and everything else that made this spring awesome.

None of that weak-ass shit.

p.s. if any of my numbers are wrong, or you disagree with my superlative assignments, or you can come up with even better ones, let me know.

John’s (un)Official Race Report: Dartmouth’s L’Enfer du Nord and UNH’s Live Free or Ride Harder

Before anything is said about this past weekend, apologies are owed to Mr. Todd Brenner for grievous oversight in last week’s post.  Todd, having received battle wounds (including a concussion) in the fight for the glorious cause (read: while racing over spring break), was unable to join the team on the road at Yale, but nevertheless played the role of the soigneur to perfection, providing transportation, moral support, and evidence that the Ephs did indeed tear up the road in New Haven.


Proof that Todd was indeed at Yale: he took this awesome artsy fartsy photo of Ian and Erik at the line.

Todd was back in the saddle this weekend, ready to join the rest of the hardcore crew as they traveled to the (rather bizarre) state of New Hampshire (Live Free or Die, state operated drive-in liquor stores, etc.) to finish off their ECCC season.

First up was the ironically (or perhaps aptly) titled L’Enfer du Nord at Dartmouth.  With temperatures dropping decisively below ‘brisk’, the Ephs had to work hard to just stay warm, let alone go fast.  Saturday’s highlights:

-Erik and Amy reprise their amazing performances from the Yale crit.

-John snaps his rear derailleur cable with 4.5 laps left in the crit, leaving him with two speeds (hard, and VERY VERY HARD), and manages to finish 8th to snag the last available point

-Ice baths for all!

-Henry’s newfound way of expressing emotion: “THE F***ING LAARB!” (Alternatively, “F*** THE LAARB!”)

-Todd plays digestive system roulette (“How spicy, 1-5?”)

-“Men’s D?  Why not Men’s A++?”

On Sunday, the team awoke bright and early to a frigid, rainy morning.  Undaunted by the decidedly miserable conditions, Todd, John, and Henry set out to ride their first ever Team Time Trial without any practice.  Erik rode his with two riders from Lehigh.  Thoroughly soaked, the team retreated to warm themselves at the hearth (Coach Cruz’s Honda Element) before once again venturing out for the road race.  The important facts:

-Todd proves once again that he has mastered the art of vomiting during a bike race and continuing unfazed.  Erik, in awe of Todd’s skill, decides to try too.

-Henry has perhaps the most fun of anyone in the road race.  After sliding out twice and beating up his already battered loaner bike, he rides the rest of the race in the UVM van, eating donuts and heckling Women’s C riders.

-Amy arrives at the finish line a full 8 minutes before the rest of the Women’s C field, having reached a level of Erik-like mental…calm.

All in all, it was an excellent weekend to finish out the team’s season.  Expect a full season recap in the next few days.

Results (no one cares about these)

Dartmouth ITT
Women’s C
2nd – Amy Levine

Men’s C
1st – Erik Levinsohn

Men’s D
3rd – John Hawthorne
7th – Henry Schmidt
11th – Todd Brenner

Dartmouth Crit
Women’s C
27th – Amy Levine

Men’s C
32nd – Erik Levinsohn

Men’s D2
8th – John Hawthorne
17th – Henry Schmidt

UNH TTT
Men’s D
4th – Team New York Driving Lesson (Todd, John, Henry)

UNH Road Race (40 Miles of slick, back road New Hampshire goodness)
Women’s C
1st – Amy Levine

Men’s C
8th – Erik Levinsohn

Men’s D
5th – John Hawthorne
29th – Todd Brenner

John’s (un)Official Race Report: Yale Lux et Velocitas, or: MOVE B****, GET OUT THE WAY

There was no way that the weekend of April 9-10th was not going to be epic.

Jen is a boss

The Ephs had been eagerly awaiting a return to New Haven ever since team captain Erik “Division III majors are faster” Levinsohn absolutely wrecked the Men’s D2 field last year in both the ITT and the Circuit, while the rest of last year’s squad delivered performances which made the ECCC sit up and wonder who the heck these purple-splotched speed demons were.  Last year the Ephs walked away with one blue and white polka dot King of the Mountains jersey.  This year, they planned to walk away with several.

Combine this determination with a healthy dose of team spirit and absurdity cultivated by Erik, Ian, and John over spring break, and introduced to the rest of the team by frequent references to “MAN VS HILL” and “RAGS”, and the team was in for a hell of a weekend.

Friday’s highlights:

-Erik drinks degreaser from the bottle clearly labeled “DO NOT DRINK, DEGREASER”
-Much discussion at dinner of the general moral bankruptcy of certain members of the classes of 2013 and 2014
-Despite being equipped with EZPass, Team Lexus arrives at the Levinsohn residence after Team Ragwagon
-Much discussion of whether Erik’s proposed use of his father’s Zipp 404 during the ITT would qualify him for the title of “Tool” in addition to “Rag”.

Saturday:

-Two KoM’s.  NBD.  Erik proves he was right to use the 404.
-Ian loses some skin but gains badassery points.  His shorts are now on display in the ark.
-Heath learns first hand that the universe has a sick sense of humor when it comes to shifting cables.
-Procrastination as a team sport.

Sunday:

-THE AERO-PHISH
AEROPHISH
-Two UVM riders ride a ceremonial lap before the crit on a tandem, the stoker rabidly waving an American flag
-A Bowdoin rider who, despite having returned to his hotel room at 6:15AM after a night of partying with the Yale crew team, manages to win both primes in the Men’s D2 crit and come in 3rd in the final sprint.
-Team sing-a-long of Wagon Wheel.

Oh, and there were bike races too.  Because no one else has posted these yet:

-ITT (Hill Climb)

Women’s C
1st – Amy Levine
17th – Jen Rowe
29th – Heath Goldman

Men’s C
1st – Erik Levinsohn
14th – Ian Nesbitt

Men’s D2
5th – John Hawthorne
10th – Henry Schmidt

-Circuit Race

Women’s C
1st – Amy Levine
16th – Jen Rowe

Men’s C
3rd – Erik Levinsohn

Men’s D2
4th – John Hawthorne
36th – Henry Schmidt

-Criterium

Women’s C
14th – Jen Rowe
27th – Amy Levine

Men’s C2
20th – Erik Levinsohn

Men’s D2
7th – John Hawthorne
13th – Henry Schmidt

Photo credits: Chatura Attapatu

John’s (un)Official Race Report: SPRING BREAK (“We’re really doin’ it!”) Edition

This afternoon Ian, Erik, and I participated in a super fun practice crit with the patrons of Grand Strand Bicycles, on a fun short course with five or so forgiving corners. The group was about 22 strong, and consisted of a wide range of skill and fitness levels, ranging from the 60 year old weekend warrior to a Cat 2 guy who ten years ago finished 4th, immediately behind George Hincapie, in a fairly prominent southern road race.

Grand Strand Crit
The course, a loop in a yet-to-be-developed Tournament Players Course golf resort.

After doing two neutral laps at a brisk pace to allow everyone to get a feel for the course, the group took off, quickly splintering into several parts. Erik and I preferred a relaxed approach to the race; we sat on the back, and, after getting shelled, proceeded to put in what amounted to a good 35 minute workout as we pushed hard around the course, lapping the 40 year olds who were riding supremely expensive Madones and Tarmacs. Ian started off with the front group, and once again proved that he is an unqualified boss by sticking with the leaders, eventually earning 4th.

All in all, we repped Williams hardcore and had a great time doing it.  If you’re ever in the Myrtle Beach area, hit up Grand Strand Bicycles. They’re good people.

Spring Break ’11: “WE’RE REALLY DOIN’ IT!” – Part 2

Many bro-tastic things have occurred since Ian first reported our arrival in South Carolina at the beginning of the week.  The highlights include:

-Getting lost (multiple times) on back roads in rural South Carolina

-Copious amounts of Halo: Reach

-Hot tubbing

-BUFFALOOOOOOOOOOOO

-Gourmet cuisine

-Doing core workouts on the beach

-An epic struggle of historic proportions, against a metal-clad and carbonated-beverage-filled foe

Coming up in the next few days:

-A practice crit with some locals

-A century

-More beach time.  Ah yeah.

And now I’m off to shave my legs!

Spring Break ’11: “WE’RE REALLY DOIN’ IT!” – Part 1

70!?
We passed through the land of the 70mph speed limit (AKA I40 in North Carolina), offering us a slightly more legal reason to test the power of Ericbrah’s Honda Accord. You wouldn’t believe how hard it is to get a picture of a speed limit sign when moving at 85mph.

The roads have graciously led us to the hallowed Southland. After roughly fourteen hours of singing, storytelling, and yelling “SPRING BREAK” at innocent passersby, we find ourselves in a beach house in North Myrtle Beach that overlooks the water. (The house includes a slightly excessive pool and hot tub, just in case we are too lazy to take advantage of the ocean, which as college students we certainly will be.) The road to paradise was filled with strange things not often seen in the bubble (often described as a purple sphere surrounding campus) that engulfs our usual daily activities.

At a rest stop in North Carolina, we saw this:
This dude is now my hero.
Which immediately made us think of much stranger things.
YO DAWG
The Great Xzibit, legendary host of the epic phenomenon that is Pimp My Ride.


Did someone say we’re pretty close to the beach?

IMAG0055
John, seen here, is likely thinking about the legendary things scheduled to happen in the week to come. So if it happens, and it’s legendary, we will blog about it. Check back on our shenanigans later.