Category Archives: 12 AM thoughts

It was one of those rare days — a sunny, cloudless day — that just makes you want to drop your math pset and go for a walk outside. So that’s exactly what I did. Am I going to continue justifying my chronic procrastination with “I had to enjoy the good weather because you never know when it comes around again”, even as it’s coming around again more and more often? Maybe!

Halfway through my walk, I happened to come across a lost pupper. And before I could maintain proper social distancing measures, he flung his 60 pounds of pure puppy muscle straight at me! I hope dogs can’t pass on ‘rona cause he slobbered all over my face as a greeting. How lovely 🥰 After a moment the owner caught up, apologizing to me that he was so excited to be outside (just like me) that he escaped the leash! I had already forgiven him from the get-go because honestly, if I was a dog, I would do the same.

So do I regret procrastinating on my math pset that I haven’t started yet and is due in 3 minutes? Not in the slightest.

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Zoom 1: Starting a CS project with a couple of others this summer! To get everyone on the same page and figure out where we want to go, we had our first get-together via everyone’s favorite video conferencing application. CS projects lend themselves to be remotely-workable by nature, but I think even a semblance of physical connection via video helps tremendously to build chemistry and understand each other.

Zoom 2: Wufo get together + kraftees (alumni)! It was a bit surreal watching the captains hand down their titles to the juniors, almost like it made the season being cut short official. Banter was amok like always, and it was exciting seeing people for the first time in a month with good-intentioned but poorly-executed facial hair. I miss my family 💜

Zoom 3: C-Bling (Take 2)! Forgot if I mentioned, but I joined this CS mentorship program where upperclassmen are paired with underclassmen to help navigate them through their CS journey. One of the young’uns (not me I swear) overslept the first call where we got to know each other so we tried again today! Luckily they made it this time and I gained some extra tips and tricks too so that was nice.

Zoom 4: Entry snacks! Lots of talk of TV shows and Covid=bad, but it was fun nonetheless. People seem to be coping on average, or at least put on a facade to. That’s what I’m doing at least.

17 C today!!! This is what spring in Willytown SHOULD be like.

I decided to go on a hike with two of my friends to celebrate. It was already close to sunset, so we couldn’t climb up anything big so we settled for the classic Stone Hill. Stepping across the stone floor of the man-made lake in the Clark (now drained and dried), we made it to the base. When we looked up, we weren’t the only ones there! Five beautiful brown-eyed cows were munching on their dinner above us. Reasonably sure that we wouldn’t catch corona through them, we slowly approached them from the front, grass in hand. The one closest to me sniffed my palm, only to reject my hand-plucked grass. 🥺. I don’t think she despised my presence though, because she grudgingly allowed me to snap a selfie with her. My friend’s cow, on the other hand, responded to his approach with a gushing stream of cow pee. After seeing all the “jellyfish are returning to the Venice Canal! You won’t believe what they do next” Facebook posts, you might be tempted to think the appearance of cows is due to the same reason, a decline in human activity. But no, these homies have been chilling atop Stone Hill for centuries, and we were just lucky to run into them during their snack time. As the sun set, my mind wandered once again to the beauty this Purple Valley provides, and all the good memories associated with it. The cows moo-ed in bliss, unaware of all that has gone wrong in this world.

Today was the first day of fasting for my Muslim friends. Normally it would be a uniting time shared with family and friends, but under quarantine, it’s observed in isolation. For the students on campus, there was worry that they wouldn’t be able to eat because dinner is only served from 4:30–6:30 pm. Thankfully, the dining staff were accommodating and will be delivering food individually at sunset. They also dropped off two boxes full of storable foods and drinks. Unfortunately, some problems still persist. To quote my friend, “Man, I need more food.” Fasting while finals season is approaching makes it difficult to concentrate, and people need to replenish as much as possible when breaking it. Hopefully they can get more food from dining or can figure out a way to order healthy food online at night.

Even though I’m in Spontaneous Outings, the groupme for — you guessed it — spontaneous outings, I’ve never taken part in any of their adventures. I always wanted to, but was too busy with something else. But today, I realized what the allure was. Something about procrastinating by saying “frick it, I’m gonna climb up Pine Cobble instead of finishing my math homework” is so innately satisfying. So that’s just what I did. The sky was clear, giving me the go-ahead sign so I couldn’t refuse! With this sporadic weather, I’d be silly not to take advantage of the glimpses of sunshine.

On the way up, I met two dogs (and their owner) and I waved at them from 6+ feet away. They didn’t seem to get the concept of social distancing, so were understandably disappointed that I didn’t go up to them to give them a pat. Just know I still love you, doggos.

I wake early (11:30 am) today to get breakfast before my class, and it’s SNOWING OUTSIDE? WHEN IT’S ALMOST MAY? I get that it’s your celebration day, Earth, but can you show your love in a different form? Say, like a sunny sky with a rainbow on top? The Earth flag that was hanging in front of the Congregational Church for the past week was rolled up due to the wind. Kinda ominous if you ask me. I really hope we start treating her with a little extra care after COVID, but I doubt it. Maybe business flights will slowly be replaced by video-conferencing, but other than that, I can’t really see any tangibly positive changes arising from this. More remote work? That’d be lovely.

I did pushups today for the first time since quarantine! 90 of them, in fact. I can already feel the chest soreness kicking in tomorrow, but it was worth it. I’ve been sitting at my desk for 90% of my waking hours for the past week or so, and I really need to change that. Habits are hard to make, but I’m in a (mini) valley in my course-load right now so I thought I should kick start myself into a better one. Ideally, I’d go running or workout outside but the New England weather doesn’t seem to be cooperating. So I guess we’re stuck with doing pushups on the dirty croom rug for now.

Relationships, when going swimmingly, feel like they take no effort. Because everything seems to fall into place. But that’s not how relationships really work! You only think it’s effortless because the both of you are feeding energy into it and building off of it. Which is natural if you spend the majority of your waking (and sleeping) time with them. But with a long distance relationship, when you’re both confined to a glass screen the size of your palm, it’s harder to keep that energy going. A day or two can go by without even seeing them, and memories start to fade away. You have to make a conscious effort to engage in the relationship, because the default state, unfortunately, is not. It sadly took me a while to realize this but I’m glad I understand now before it became too late. You have to put in the effort, but it’s worth it 3000x.

I miss my friendies! I finally caught up with various friends after a long time and it was so cathartic. Key takeaways: everyone’s sad, everyone’s bored but somehow overwhelmed at the same time, and everyone misses each other 🥰 I can’t wait for the day we meet up again. When will that be? Only time will tell.